Who’s The Boss?

June 7, 2021

What are your driving nightmares?

Have you ever driven behind a really inconsiderate driver, the kind who on a nice road trip slows down up hills on a barrier line, and then speeds up like crazy just when you have the opportunity to finally overtake, so that you can’t? Or who parks on a red line which clearly means no stopping, let alone no parking, and so holds up all the frantic traffic behind! Or my favourite: the person turning right at the intersection who creeps forward timidly, making space only for himself – which means that when the traffic light finally changes, they are the only car that can cross the road legally, when there was at least space for three cars that could have made it. I’m sure you have many pet peeves of your own!

These used to really get to me. Until I had the realisation that after this sort of experience, I was the one left feeling off balance, grumpy and out of sorts. And the angry feelings would stay a while! And the perpetrator of the heinous traffic “crimes” would go on their merry way, either oblivious or unconcerned, continuing to inhabit their happy bubble.

So actually, who was I selling out to? I was giving the power to temporarily take away my equanimity and happiness to some inconsiderate and selfish idiot. This makes no sense!

So I resolved to take back my Power. I refuse to allow bad drivers be my puppet master pulling my unhappiness strings. I am going to be the one to decide whether I will be happy or not! There’s that tiny moment between stimulus and reaction where we can actually choose to “respond” instead of “react”.

And it’s not just about driving. It generalises to many aspects of our lives – to all the things that habitually press our buttons.

So I resolved next time I had a button pressed to ask myself: So who IS the boss? This, or me?

And I choose me. I’m the boss!

Most of the time ;-D.

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