Blog

Read my latest Blog posts…

The stories we tell..

Posted by on June 3, 2015 in Blog | 0 comments

The stories we tell..

For many people, death is preferable to public speaking. Public speaker, Robin Banks tells the story of a woman he met who when she heard what he does for a living, proclaimed that she would rather die than have to do what he does. She told him how when she was little and had to give her first formal speech in class, she dried – and everyone laughed at her. The humiliation she felt haunts her still. Now Robin, as a little boy, also got publically laughed at. On stage as King Herod in a school play, clunky little guy that he was, he...

read more

Betrayal and Forgiveness

Posted by on June 2, 2015 in Blog | 0 comments

Betrayal and Forgiveness

The other day, I met a man in his sixties, who left his wife and family over twenty years ago when he inadvertently fell in love with another woman. What made it even more of a betrayal for his ex-wife was that the new couple also decided to have a child together. He has been a devoted father to all of his children, who love him dearly – but he crushed his wife when he left her. She never remarried. She never took lovers. In fact, she generalized her anger to include all men. She won’t employ a male workman if a woman can do the job....

read more

Noomii Interview

Posted by on May 27, 2015 in Blog | 0 comments

Noomii Interview

Bernie is a member of an international Coach Directory called Noomii based in Vancouver and has recently conducted an audio interview with them. Have a listen here to the Noomii interview.  

read more

How do we get to a point of Acceptance during loss?

Posted by on May 25, 2015 in Blog | 0 comments

How do we get to a point of Acceptance during loss?

Last week I wrote about how my hairdresser cruised some really challenging circumstances by kicking off from a point of acceptance. See Which “V” do you choose? (Three A’s to happiness in a storm.) But how do you get to this point of acceptance when you’ve suffered a loss or a trauma in your life? The main thing is not to expect too much from yourself too quickly. The whole thing is a process, which goes through many phases, and even cycles backwards and forwards through the phases a few times. See if you recognize how you may have shown up...

read more

Finding confidence when you really need it

Posted by on May 22, 2015 in Blog | 0 comments

Finding confidence when you really need it

Whether you’re the CEO, HoD or Joe or Mary Soap, we all have stressful situations in our lives where we could do with that extra dollop of confidence. Going up the hierarchy, perhaps you need to ask a favour of your boss; going down the hierarchy, perhaps you need to confront a recalcitrant employee and call them to book. And if it’s not a courageous conversation you need to have, you may be going for a job interview, nailing that deal or having to give a public speech. Is there anything you can do to prepare yourself so that you go out there...

read more

Part 3 of a series on weight loss – So should I never eat junk?

Posted by on May 21, 2015 in Blog | 0 comments

Part 3 of a series on weight loss – So should I never eat junk?

Of course you should! And I’d like to state that you can eat junk and still lose weight. In fact, I would go so far as to say that I believe you won’t win your weight loss battle unless you eat some junk! The reason for this is that we eat not only in order to nourish our bodies, but also to give us pleasure, and in this way to feed our souls. Deprive yourself of the joy of eating for long enough, and your soul will go into rebellion – big time! Here is why you fall off that diet wagon. Then, crazily, we label ourselves as weak and often the...

read more

Part 2 of a series on weight loss – What are our real hungers?

Posted by on May 20, 2015 in Blog | 1 comment

Part 2 of a series on weight loss – What are our real hungers?

So when you are overeating, or eating when you are not physically hungry, or eating the wrong foods, you are doing so to satisfy a genuine and powerful hunger for something else that will not be denied. Instead of beating yourself up about it, try to become curious about what is actually going on within you. In their 2005 article in the Journal of Nutritional Educational Behaviour, Sjostrom and Steiner-Adair* identified the following hungers, all of which except for the first one, we may mistakenly try to satisfy with food: Tummy hunger      ...

read more

Which “V” do you choose?  (Three A’s to happiness in a storm.)

Posted by on May 19, 2015 in Blog | 0 comments

Which “V” do you choose?  (Three A’s to happiness in a storm.)

While I was at my hairdresser the other day, she got a phone call to say her four-year-old daughter had had a fit while at school. I heard her making a few more anxious phone calls, and then she returned to breezily finish off my hair. I was amazed at her equanimity at what I imagined must be such a stressful time! I asked how she managed to be not just calm, but cheerful, under these circumstances. She replied that her daughter was born with fontanels that were fused at birth, and which caused her brain to be under pressure. They’d had to be...

read more

Part 1 of a series on weight loss – The diet temptation

Posted by on May 13, 2015 in Blog | 0 comments

Part 1 of a series on weight loss – The diet temptation

It’s lovely to be motivated to effect change in your life like losing weight and living a healthier life.  It’s a great way to re-establish control if things are going a bit pear shaped at the moment. So you may be tempted to go on a diet. My experience of all diets is that they don’t work over time, even though there may be a burst of weight loss in the beginning. This is normally followed by a slow-down in your weight loss, accompanied by a sense of frustration.  Perhaps at this point you fall off the wagon and beat yourself up...

read more

Making friends with negative emotions

Posted by on May 12, 2015 in Blog | 0 comments

Making friends with negative emotions

The poem The Guest House by Jalaluddin Rumi speaks of the importance of being open and tolerating all emotions, even the uncomfortable ones. I think that we often amplify our distress by fighting those feelings which we regard as negative, and in this way we heap anxiety on top of the storm we are already experiencing, making it so much worse. If we can be like an expectant mother in labour, and gently breathe into the “contraction” of pain, fear or despair – relax, and lean into it, cresting it like the wave that it is, knowing it will...

read more

What kinds of Coaching are available?

Posted by on October 2, 2014 in Blog | Comments Off

What kinds of Coaching are available?

What kinds of Coaching are available?

read more

How does Coaching work?

Posted by on October 2, 2014 in Blog | Comments Off

How does Coaching work?

How does Coaching work?

read more

At what time of Life do people come for Coaching?

Posted by on October 2, 2014 in Blog | Comments Off

At what time of Life do people come for Coaching?

At what time of Life do people come for Coaching?

read more

Why do I need Coaching / How will it benefit me?

Posted by on October 2, 2014 in Blog | Comments Off

Why do I need Coaching / How will it benefit me?

Why do I need Coaching / How will it benefit me?

read more